Tuesday, October 06, 2020

This is Father Julian, a priest somewhat famous for being from one of the few churches in the country that offers a Squirrel Mass every evening and twice on Saturday. Less known to his congregation is that fact that Father Julian is one of the last squirrel exorcists left in the world—in that he’s a squirrel that exorcises people who are possessed, and not someone who exorcises squirrels that are possessed, because squirrels just don’t get possessed. It’s like they have natural immunity to it, the same way that squirrels rarely get rabies because of a similar immunity. It’s this natural immunity that makes squirrels such great exorcists, but unfortunately, tends to put whoever is helping them with the exorcism in even greater danger.


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