Friday, January 22, 2021

This is a rather aggressive cosmetics salesperson named Eunice. The first time Eunice came around with her little case full of powders and creams and smelly ointments, I tried to explain to her that the makeup she was trying to push on me was designed specifically for squirrels, and wouldn’t look good on me at all since I’m not a squirrel. “Oh, no!” she said. “This makeup works for _all_ skin types!” and proceed to give me a free makeover that left me looking like a squirrel that had been kidnapped by a family of clowns. I’ve been avoiding the “ding dong” of her at the front door for the past week, but apparently some of the other squirrels told her to go around back and knock at the window instead.

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